I will be a Light unto the world. <body>
A tired week
Tuesday, September 28, 2004

haha...have been so lazy to write...hmmm...last thu i jus went jogging with some colleagues and my supervisor...hmmm....yesterday ran a longer route...thank God for His strength sia...hmm...getting ready for my narfa...so stress...both my god-sis n best frien got gold.haha....dun wan to lose out to them so have been training hard....hee

An exciting week
Wednesday, September 22, 2004

hmmm...so long din blog le....haha...hmmm....really been bz sia...and kinda lazy to blog...hmmm....well....Discovery Weekend last week was simply great...the speakers were so anointed and the things they share have really help me to really start thinking bout my future le...hmm...and the night group sharing was simply great..though there are only 3 of us...but we shared for bout 3 hrs....haha..then i went out for supper with the guys..staying in the hotel room to watch tv by myself till 4 + before i went to slp and we gotta wake up at 7...but thank God for the strength..He sustain me throughout the whole sat without feeling tired....got more to say but lz..haha

A quick update!
Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Xiaogou says she is coming for service this fri. So happy, just now she even ask me what she can pray for me. If only she can see my face now, I am grinning from ear to ear! Cant wait for Friday to come! Yeah…

Stupid xiaohei bite me my hand. I really don’t know the reason why…but this is the first time he bit me so bad that I bled quite a bit. So angry…now I have abit of phobia touching him.

Had a nighmare last night, dreamt that a dinosaur and zombie were chasing me in a hospital. Where did I get this weird dream from? I woke up with my heart beating real fast. It was really exciting, running up and down the hospital. But what amazes me is that in my dream, the dino was made of paper! Then why did I run? Dumb..:) but nevertheless it was really exciting. How I wish tonight I can continue my dream! Hehe I will burn the dino to death. That will be fun. Haha

Gave Kailin and Tim Quek BS on Monday, haha, have some great fun praying and fellowshipping. I said a sentence that makes me feel so bad even till today. Tim Quek, I really don’t mean it. Haha J

Just attended songleader class and learnt quite a fair bit on singing. I didn’t know singing requires so much skills! Think I gotta work harder.

Have some revelations to share with you all, but will probably blog it tomorrow when I have more time, got to sleep! Is my update quick? hehe

An exciting Weekend
Monday, September 13, 2004

yeah...friday svc was so great..those who r there,i m sure that u will agree the atmosphere is really diff...the presence of God was there when Pst Derek begin to preach...The atmosphere is jus so diff...the last time we have this is like so long ago...i responded to the altar call that day..with tears in my eyes..God,i m sorry for all the things i have done...God comforted me like a friend..yeah...Jesus,u r my best friend,u will always be,nothing will ever change that...

Sat i have very long working hrs...from 12-3 and 6-11..haha....my 1st day working nite shift..tired but fun..all the pple crazy de...did closing with Irene,Mag and serene...haha...have so much fun pushing the chairs n tables n with my dirty shoes,serene cannot stnad me sia...keep dirtying her floor...haha...but we had fun sia...they so funny,take mango drink le then manager come in they dun dare to take n it end up in the dustbin...haha...when we left the shop,she kept shouting for her mango juice,thank God i put it in my water bottles and i let her drink some...haha...

Yesterday i woke up early to work(attachment de),gotta reach office at 8.15,so woke up at 6 n left hm at 6.45,so tired sia...coz slept late on sat...then went down with my supervisor to a church in Katong...after we finish doing evverything...my supervisor say i can come in at 1pm today..meaning half day off...so happpy...yeah...then i went back to church to fellowship n spent time with my friends...yeah..yesterady i was there at the president star challenge...guess wat,when we reach..we saw Xu Mei Zhen in her car...when we reach mediacorp,on our way to the toilet...we saw Ronald n Lee Jia Wei...she is so cool...so pretty...got her signature..yeah...and manage to take a group photo with her..waiting for my frined to send me the pic...Sun is so cool yesterday...she came out during the grad finale..sing "Reach out with love'..i love her dress she wore...hmmm...Sun,we will always support you...reach hm at bout 11.30...today come to work at 1 but i reach at 12.15...haha...n my colleague told me that everyone loking for me..haha..coz normally i m te 1st to arrive at office...hmmm...today nothing to do at office coz the video camera something wrong..thats y got time to post such a long post...yeah...

A Great Article
Friday, September 10, 2004

church by neville nah

she walked into the church and gazed upon the huge cross set against a beautiful mosaic of stained glass. upon the cross hung Jesus, a pained look on his face.

" he mourns not for himself, but for the fate of man " she remembered her pastor saying once.

she moved to the front and sat down on a pew, closing her eyes to pray. perhaps it was the serenity of the place that collided with the chaos in her heart. she started to cry. she then felt a hand upon her shoulders, but it was unlike any other hand. instead of adding its own weight upon her, the hand seemed to alleviate some of the burden that her heart and battered soul carried. she wiped away her tears and looked up to the face that she knew could only belong to.

" God? "

" yes. "
" what are you doing here? "
" well, the last i checked, this was the house of the Lord. " God smiled.

she smiled back.

" nietzsche said you were dead, that we killed you. "
" and yet here I am. "

" do you have something you want to tell me, child? "
" dun you already know? "
" of course i do. "
" then why do you still ask? "
" because sometimes speaking about the problem provides for a vent, an outlet which might exactly be what is required to move along. "
" is it considered blasphemous for me to record all this down later? "
" why would it be? "
" because people wun believe that i actually spoke to you and they might think that i am making all this up. "
" that is the same fate the bible suffered once too. "
" but i dun intend to write a new chapter to the bible. "
" i know you dun, and conversations are personal things. this one is between you and me. if both you and i know and hold it to be true, then it does not matter what anyone else thinks. "
" so its alright for me to write it down? "
" people have printed books and made millions writing about their conversations with me. "

she looked down at her hands shifting her gaze to the floor, where her tears lay, gleaming in their own insignificant pools yet holding in them the infinite nature of her grief.

" can I ask you something? "
" anything. "
" do you think its worth going after something that you know will eventually end? "
" of course. "
" but why? the fact that you know it will eventually end makes the whole effort seem so pointless and redundant. "
" do you think that you should have been born unto this earth in the first place? "
" yes of course,although i think otherwise sometimes. "
" and you think this way even though you know that you will eventually die? "

she smiled.

" everything in this world has a beginning and an end, its the middle portion that is indeterminate. some things last for a fraction of a second, others seem to last forever. but regardless of the time spanned, it is the experience of the process that makes living it out worth it. you dun gain anything from beginnings and ends, but only from what lies in between them. "

" and if we make mistakes in between? "
" then you will learn from them "
" what if we make mistakes that we know we should not make?"
" then you will learn from them more "
" what if we make the same mistake again? "
" then you will learn from it yet again "

" and what will you do? "
" i will forgive. "

she cried.

and she cried out loud.

" GOD! stop it, please! why do you do this to us, to me? how can you promise us your infinite grace and your mercy as we sin before your very eyes? how can you expect me to be unto you when you are perfect and i am flawed? how can you expect me to understand you, God, when i am only human? "

" does this cause you much grief? "
" it makes my life almost unbearable "

and there was a moment of silence between them as they looked to the front, at the cross that hung before the mosaic.

she sniffed and wiped away her tears.

" dun you think its very unfair? "
" that the perfect man died for imperfect men? "

" why dun you give us direct straightforward answers God? "
" because you dun give me direct straightforward questions. "
" and yet you love us still, for all our idiosyncrasies, for all our wavering doubts, for all our false hopes and for all our blasphemy. "
" well believe it or not, i made you. "

and she smiled again.

" why do you choose to preach through the mouths of fallible humans? why dun you appear before the masses as you have before me now and tell them the truth the way you meant for it to be told.? you might even get more believers that way. "
" i did once. and look what happened. "

she followed his eyes back onto the cross and saw the vacuum in his eyes. eyes which drew everything into them, sin and sinner. and yet eyes which reflected none of those back onto them. and there they sat till the end, not saying another word, for the blanks and empty spaces between them need never be filled because they both knew what laid within.

life, as it was. with its suspense and its surprise. with its good and its evil. with its beginning and its end.

and everything in between.

25hrs camp
Thursday, September 09, 2004

wow...mummy...u r fast...jus a 4 days din blog...so many changes le...haha...look like u can kip ur own blog le...hahha...
This week is a wonderful week for me...attended a seminar "No Apologies" about Life,Love and Sex..its a wondwerful seminar n i have benefited from it a lot....hmmm...Mon n tue SPCCC have our 25HRS CAMP ..its was so fun...i enjoyed myself getting myself dirty in soapy water and geeting dirty n wet...it was so shiok..i enjoyed it a lot n the camp was planned by our freshman...n also i finally get to meet my best friend..haven seen her for quite some time le...haha...really miss her sia...haha....hmmmm...ya....today i came back to work,sick...coz not enough rest n also because slept in air con room during the camp...i m more used to jus having a fan...Now i m looking forward to the discpvery weekend...a camp that will help me to plan for my future when i graduate....in 2 weeks time...yeah...

so irritating..I cant blog but send pictures haha Posted by Hello

someone is among the er....:) u know! Posted by Hello

Sunday, September 05, 2004

my beloved cat :) Posted by Hello

My dear cat hiding in the cupboard

Jesus Rulz!

Another week is over!!!

Coolz...another week is over. so tired! but so renewed in spirit. Feel so happy this week. its like a breakthrough for me! cause my xiao gou went for service. I wonder how is she feeling now? But if she can see this post, I would really want her to know this that we are all praying for her to return back to ET zone! You know on saturday when you ask me so many questions about Christ, I am really happy because it means you are thinking. I really hope that what I replied you is able to help you. But if you want we can meet up and talk cause I think if we have a face to face conversation, it will be better! *Miss you*

Wah so happy, today took so many neoprints. haha :) realised that I have not been taking it for quite sometime. Used to have alot but cant remember where I placed them. Just now while I was blogging halfway, suddenly I heard music from my parents room, I got a shocked! No one is around except me and the music was loud. It was really eerie! I took a deep breath, walked inside the room and guess who switched on the radio. Its my CAT!!! I burst out laughing. haha Xiaohei is so funny, never fails to entertain me. How did he switch on the radio? haha thats a secret, but indeed I am not lying when I say my cat did tht. haha

Ok guess some of you must be scratching your head. Well actually my cat loves to sleep on this dressing table in my parents room. On this dressing table, there is this small alarm radio and my cat always use that radio as a pillow to sleep. Sometimes I wonder does he feel pain sleeping on plastic, but anyway I guess today while sleeping, he accidentally slept on the on button or maybe he did pushed it. haha. He is so funny. love you xiaohei :)

Today I had a great time in service because the message is just so awesome! Especially the part when pst kong say let your will be done. haha I really laughed till tears dropped. Guess only suting and gavin knows why. But on top of that, its the presence of God, its Holy Spirit that makes it so great. Love you God. Feels so challenged to increase my QT.

me n my friends
Friday, September 03, 2004


yesterday was a great day for me...i did my Quiet Time in the morning and for the whole day..i felt so refreshed and joyful...I told God that i want to step out in faith n prophesy in cg....true enough...throughout the worship,this verse Matt 11:28 kept coming to my mind..hmmm....yeah..n even till today...the joy of God is still in me..Praise the Lord for His grace and mercy

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

today is teacher's day...the pri sch students so good..no sch for them...to all the teachers out there...Happy Teachers' Day...today whole something wrong with my com so cannot go online..so sianz....well...haven been sleeping well the past few nights..so tired...i like the pictures posted by catslover earlier...they r really nice...nice memories...haha...hmm...today is a bz day for me..from morning till now....

"You are the light of the world. let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."
Matthew 5:14,16

God's beloved child
18th November 1985
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