I will be a Light unto the world. <body>
HAPPY "牛" YEAR
Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Happy new year to all...cny is the bost boring time in the world for me cause we just go visiting...and when mum is talking to relatives..i just watch tv...

cny day 1...visiting mum's side relatives...went to 1st uncle house at 12 then watch tv..channel 8 but boring shows...then went god-grandma house at 4 plus...tv spoiled on cny eve...boring..no tv...went to 2nd uncle house at 9...finally got tv shows to watch..

cny day 2...went to this auntie house...watch this china channell...boring until cannot sia...then went back to eldest auntie house...no channel u...channel 8 is this super boring show...cannot tahan sia...

these 2 days din eat a lot...my mum is sick..whatever she eat..she vomit...this morning still diarhoea....

and guess what..cny day 1 receive total of $80+ ang bao...and 2nd day only 30+...a total less than 120...excluding my mum's ang bao...hope there is more to come...else building fund dunno how to fulfill...gave half of my bonus $$ to my mum...so not much left...



Touched!!!!
Thursday, January 22, 2009

Today my line got suspended cause din pay the bill of $448 which amounted for the past 3 months...then I called M1 to ask for activation for 1 more day and i will clear the bill after i get my pay tomorrow...my director came to know it and she ask if i want to borrow from her 1st to clear the bill..i say its ok..anyway pay will be debited to our acc tonight at 12am...her concern touched me...then she told me not to worry...i will be happy when i see the payslip today...so i know must be bonus money also will be in tonight... :)



Find Something to Be Grateful for Every Day
Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Every day, be full of awareness
Of the beauty around you.

Be full of gratitude
For friends and family,
For the goodness you find in others,
For your health and all you’re capable of.

Be full of acceptance
Of yourself and others –
Without conditions or judging,
Knowing the differences and changes
Makes life interesting.

Appreciate the gifts of laughter
And fun in your life,
And find contentment in knowing
That you can always control
Your ability to look on the bright side.

There is nothing which can hinder or circumvent a strong and determined soul seeking for health, usefulness, truth and success.
Keep that fact well in mind and live to it, no matter what the whole world may say to the contrary. Fear nothing. You are a part of the splendid universe, and you are here to get the best out of this phase of life… look for something thankful and glad over each day, and you will find it…
Fill your soul and mind full of love
And sympathy and joy…
And blessings
Will follow

The happiness people in the world that those who have a hard time recalling their worries… and an easy time remembering their blessings.




A-Z Do you have a friend for every letter of the alphabet?
Monday, January 19, 2009

Saw this on Hansheng's blog...isn't that tough except for the letter "u" for female...haha...



Task: Name one male and female friend for each letter of the alphabet.
A - Aaron, Amanda
B - Brandon, Belinda
C - Chris, Clara
D - David, Delphine
E - Ernest, Eleanor
F - Francis, Flora
G - Garvin, Gwen
H - Harish, Huiwen
I - Ivan, Irene
J - Jevi, Joanne
K - Keith, Kai Lin
L - Louis, Lee Ling
M - Mervyn, Mandy
N - Nick, Natalie
O - Oliver, Odelia
P - Peixiong, Pamela
Q - Qun Xiong, Qian Hui
R - Richard, Regina
S - Simon, See Wan
T - Terrance, Ting Huan
U - Uncle William, Uncle Leow
V - Vincent ,Vera
W - William, Wan Yun
X - Xin Zhe, Xinyi
Y - Yee Kiat, Yuntian
Z - Zan, Zoe



The Best Leaders Are Listeners‏
Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The Best Leaders Are Listeners
By Dr John C. Maxwell

Steven Sample, in his book The Contrarian’s Guide to Leadership, writes, “The average person suffers from three delusions: (1) that he is a good driver, (2) that he has a good sense at humor, and (3) that he is a good lis­tener.” I plead guilty on ill three counts!

I will never forget the time a lady I worked with confronted me about my poor listening skills. She said, “John, when people talk to you, often seem distracted and look around the room. We’re not sure that you are lis­tening to us!”

I was surprised because, like most people, I really did think I was a good listener. The first thing I did was apologize. I trusted the opinion of the per­son who had confronted me, and I knew it had taken courage for her to tell me. (I was her boss.)

The second thing I did was start trying to change. For several years I made it a regular practice to put an “L” in the corner of my legal pad anytime I was in a meeting to remind myself to listen. Sometimes I would write “LL” to remind myself to look at them while I listened. It made a big difference in my leadership.

Steven Sample says, “Many leaders are terrible listeners; they actually think talking is more important than listening. But contrarian leaders know it is better to listen first and talk later. And when they listen, they do so artfully.”

The positive benefits of being a good listener are much more valuable than we often recognize. Recently I read a humorous story that Jim Lange included in his book Bleedership.

A couple of rednecks are out in the woods hunting when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are rolled back in his head.
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
He frantically tells the operator. “Bubba is dead! What can I do?”
The operator, in a calm, soothing voice says, “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There is silence, and then a shot is heard.
The guy’s voice comes back on the line and says, “Okay, now what?”
As this story about rednecks illustrates—we can hear what is said without really listening to what is being communicated. The hunter above heard what the operator told him and technically did make sure that his hunting companion was dead. But had he really been listening. I don’t think he would have shot his partner.

The story may seem silly, but it contains an important truth. When we hear without really listening, our leadership is bound to suffer—and so will our followers.
I once read about a study that stated that we hear half of what is being said, listen to half of what we hear, understand half of it, believe half of that, and remember only half of that. If you translate those assumptions into an eight-hour work day, here is what it would mean:

• You spend half your day—about four hours—in listening activities.
• You hear about two hours’ worth of what is said.
• You actually listen to an hour of it.
• You understand only thirty minutes of that hour.
• You believe only fifteen minutes’ worth.
• And you remember less than eight minutes of all that is said.

That’s a pretty poor track record. And it shows that we all need to work much harder at actively listening!

Why Listeners Are More Effective Leaders

Because of my desire to be a more effective listener, I have actively observed leaders for years and paid close attention to how the effective ones listen to others. And I have come to come conclusions about the impact of good listening related to leadership.

1. Understanding People Precedes Leading Then.
Leadership finds its source in understanding. To be worthy of the respon­sibility of leadership, a person must have insight into the human heart. Sensitivity toward the hopes and dreams of people on your team is essential for connecting with than and motivating them. In my book The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leader­ship, I write about the Law of Connection, which states, “Leaders touch a heart before they ask for a hand.” You cannot connect with someone if you don’t try to listen to and understand them. Not only is it not fair to ask for the help of someone with whom you haven’t connected, it is also ineffective. If you want to be more effective connecting with people, make it your goal to understand them.

2. Listening Is the Best Way to Learn
It is no accident that we have one mouth and two ears. When we fail to listen, we shut off much of our learning potential. You’ve probably heard the phrase “seeing is believing.” Well, so is listening. Talk show host Larry King said, “I remind myself every morning nothing I say this day will teach me anything. So, if I’m going to learn. I must do it by listening.”
In 1997 we moved to Atlanta, Georgia. Immediately I realized the influ­ence of the African American community upon that city. I wanted to connect with people in that community and learn about their journey. I asked my friend Sam Chand to set up four lunches with some top African American leaders. For me, it was one of the greatest learning experiences of my life. Our time together was filled with our getting acquainted, my asking questions, and my listening to wonderful stories. I left each Lunch with new friends and great respect for the people I met and for their life experi­ences. Many individuals expressed their surprise to me that with my lead­ership experience, I did not try to teach them about leadership, but that I was the student and they were the teachers. If I had done that, I wouldn’t have learned anything. Today I am still listening to and learning from many of the leaders who became my friends at those lunches.

3. Listening Can Keep Problems from Escalating
A Cherokee proverb says, “Listen to the whispers and you won’t have to hear the screams.” Good leaders are attentive to small issues. They pay attention to their intuition. And they also pay close attention to what isn’t being said. That requires more than just good listening skills. It requires a good understanding of people, and it also means being secure enough to ask for honest communication from others and to not become defensive when receiving it. To be an effective leader, you need to let others tell you what you need to hear, not necessarily what you want to hear.
Gordon Bethune, former CEO of Continental Airlines, took this idea a step further when he advised, “Make sure you only hire people who will be willing to kick the door open if you lose direction and close it. You may be able to ignore somebody’s opinion if you don’t like it, but if the person has the data to back it up, your intellect should be able to overwhelm your vanity.”
A common fault that occurs in people as they gain more authority is impatience with those who work for them. Leaders like results. Unfortunately that action orientation sometimes causes them to stop listening. But a deaf ear is the first symptom of a closed mind, and having a closed mind is a surefire way to hurt your leadership.
The higher people go in leadership, the more authority they wield, and the less they are forced to listen to others. However, their need to listen becomes greater than ever! The farther leaders get from the front lines, the more they must depend on others for accurate information. If they haven’t formed the habit of listening – carefully and intelligently—they aren’t going to get the facts they need. And when a leader stays in the dark, what­ever problem the organization is having will only get worse.

4. Listening Establishes Trust
Effective leaders are always good communicators, but that means much more than just being a good talker. David Burns. a medical doctor and professor of psychiatry at the University of Pennsylvania, points out, “The biggest mistake you can make in trying to talk convincingly is to put your highest priority on expressing your ideas and feelings. What most people really want is to be listened to, respected, and understood. The moment people see that they are being understood, they become more motivated to understand your point of view.”
Author and speaker Brian Tracy says, “listening builds trust, the foundation of all lasting relationships.” When my employee confronted me about my poor listening skills, what she was really telling me was that I was not trustworthy. She didn’t know whether her ideas, opinions, and feelings were safe with me. By becoming a more attentive listener, I was able to earn her trust.
When leaders listen to followers and use what they hear to make improvements that benefit those who speak up and the organization, then followers put their trust in those leaders. When leaders do the opposite—when they fail to listen—it damages the leader-follower relationship. When followers no longer believe that their leaders are listening to them, they start looking for someone who will.

5. Listening Can Improve the Organization
The bottom line is that when the leader listens, the organization gets better. Former Chrysler chairman Lee Iacocca asserted, “Listening can make the difference between a mediocre company and a great one.” That means listening to people up and down the line at every level of the organi­zation—to customers, workers, and other leaders.
Dallas-based Chili’s, one of the nation’s top restaurant chains, has prided itself in having leaders who listen. Norman Brinker, onetime owner and chairman of Chili’s, believes that responsive communication is the key to good relations with both employees and customers. He also has learned that such communication pays big dividends. Almost 80 percent of Chili’s menu has come from suggestions made by unit managers.
Listening always pays dividends. The more you know, the better off you are—as long as you maintain perspective and think like a leader. Niccolo Machiavelli, author of The Prince, wrote. “Minds are of three kinds. One is capable of thinking for itself; another is able to understand the thinking of others and a third can neither think for itself nor understand the thinking of others. The first is of the highest excellence, the second is excellent, and the third is worthless.” To be a good leader, you must be able to not only think for yourself but also understand and learn from the thinking of oth­ers.
Is it possible to be a leader without being a listener? The answer is yes. Talk to employees in companies all across the country and they will tell you that they work for people who do not listen to them. Is it possible to be a good leader without listening? The answer is no. No one can go to the highest level and take his or her organization there without being a good listener. It simply doesn’t happen, because you can never get the best out of people if you don’t know who they are, where they want to go. why they care, how they think, and what they have to contribute. You can learn those things only if you listen.
Author and speaker Jim Rohn says, “One of the greatest gifts you can give anyone is the gift of attention.” I believe that’s true. But listening to fol­lowers isn’t just a gift to them. It benefits the leader too. When leaders listen, their receive others’ insight, knowledge, wisdom, and respect. That puts all of an organization’s assets into play ready to be marshaled for the fulfill­ment of the vision and the attainment of its goals. What a wonderful gift.

Application Exercises
1. Give yourself a listening audit. The next few times you are in meetings, ask your assistant or a colleague to track how many minutes you spend speaking and how many minutes you spend listening. If you are not spend­ing at least 80 percent of the time listening, you need to improve. Try writ­ing “L” on your notes where you will see it.

2. Who doesn’t feel listened to? If people you work or live with feel that you do not listen to them, you will be able to see it in their faces. Think about the people who are most important to you in your life. The next time you have a conversation with them, stop everything you’re doing, give them your undivided attention, and look them in the eye as they speak. If you see surprise, avoidance, or hostility in their expression, it may be because they feel you have not really listened to them in the past. Start a dialogue on the subject. Ask if you’ve neglected to listen in the past, and then let them talk. Don’t defend yourself. Seek only clarification and apologize if necessary.

3. What people have you neglected to seek out? Effective leaders are active listeners. By that I mean that they do more than listen to people who approach them with something to say. They seek out the thoughts, opin­ions, and feelings of others—starting with the top leaders who work for and with them. If you haven’t heard from some of your key people recently, seek them out and give them your ear.




Death of the father of my director
Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Yesterday was watching the tv at my colleague's place when she told me that William's father have just passed away. William is my Executive Director. The news came as a shock cause his father is always more healthy than his mother. Yesterday afternoon, he was in ICU due to some heart problems. We always call his father Old Uncle...Old uncle is a very friendly uncle...my manager say he used to always tell him stories...I have seen Old Uncle a few times...he is very nice guy...hmmm...ya...be going down to his wake tonight...at simei...far far end of Singapore...



2nd weekend of the year
Monday, January 12, 2009

went for thanksgiving cg on sat...it was a wonderful one...just wanna appreciate every single member who have been there for me...Minghui for being so loving n persistent...love ya...hee..

yesterday finally went back to usher and serve...its a bit weird..have not been serving since May/June 2008...it was good...i manage to fill all the seats...ya...went marina square with the cg to fellowship after clearing up my zone...had subway....then we went shop a while and to starbucks to sit...and the cg began to tell me what to eat and what not to eat to slim down...thanks guys...will try to control myself from all the good food...hee...then we played tuki tuki game and murderer...

at 5 plus...almost everyone left, me,jasmine,hansheng and weijie went to arcade..and once again, i beat hansheng to 1st place in daytona...haha...hansheng...2nd time le...hee...then we play pool and saw Nicholas...he keep saying want to challenge our best player but we dun wan to play with him...too stress...so we left after ending the game...met up with suting,david,sandy,shing & bernice for dinner....weijie,hansheng and jasmine came along too but they left after eating...i stayed with the zone members and we have so much laughter with David making fun of Sandy...haha...we sat in kfc from 7-9 plus...then we proceed to starbucks in raffles city...2 times in a day to starbucks...sat there and chat till 11 plus before we left...reach home at 12 plus...super duper tired...cannot tahan...woke up at 5.45am in the morning ytd...left the house at 6.15...so i was out of house for bout 18hrs....



Life is so vulnerable!!!!
Friday, January 09, 2009

Life is so vulnerable...ytd receive Wendy's msg: (Priscilla's dad fainted in batam and went into unconscious due to high blood pressure and when he was sent back to sg...he passed away. The funeral will be held at her house downstairs...)when i saw that msg...i was a bit shock...like before that din hear anything from her...suddenly the dad left the world...life is just so vulnerable...we must live life to the fullest...enjoy while we can...you never know what will happen the next min...



The secret behing Yoida Full Gospel Church -The largest church in the world
Thursday, January 08, 2009

got the videos from Bro Edmund's blog...its just amazing...I prayed in the morning at 4.30am too...really hopoe N317 will experience its breakthrough in attendance this yr...

With 850,000 members, this church is the Largest Mega Church in the world.


Outside Yoido Church from Edmund tay on Vimeo.


Congregation speaking in tongues from Edmund tay on Vimeo.



1st leave of the yr 2009
Tuesday, January 06, 2009

today was a tiring day....wanted to slp till 10am...but in the end...my neighbour house renovation then they started work at 9am...i got no choice but to wake up...then went for medical checkup then realise i forgot my appointment card...so told the nurse i forgot to bring it...NUH is weird...everytime i go...everytime different doc...then how they know my history and kip track though they browse thru my file...but this doc is nice...he was thorough and really studied my file and ask lots of questions...got low blood pressure...my next checkup is 1 yr later...hmm....decide to weigh myself before i go off and i got a shock...put on another 2 kg and guess what?my weight is heavier than HANSHENG...haiz...

then met hansheng at JP and shop a while cause waiting for my "son"-Weijie...I won hansheng in daytona by the last few seconds of the race...haha...then we left jp at bout 3+...reach east coast and rented bike at 4.40pm..the rental is $6 for 1hr+1hr+free drink...we cycled for 2 hrs and i must admit i was old...cannot cycle as fast as last time...maybe cause hansheng n weijie are too fast for me...but they are sweet....they kept waiting for me...even though i ask them to continue to cycle...normally i ride bike is we pedal pedal, then stop and just let the bike go for a distance before we pedal...but they were so fast that i kept pedalling....tiring sia...we went to this far end and we rested...i told weijie i very sad...put on weight ans told him my weight...he say he used to be shorter and weigh more than me...but he cycle and play basketball everyday...he lost 18kg in a month or so...motivation sia...yeah...serene is really gonna lose weight...no more procrastinating...

after cycle, met gwen and justine for dinner...Yun Tian wanted to join us but she ended work at 9.20pm...would be very late when she reach so we told her not to come...we went to the hawker at Paya Lebar for dinner before we head down for smelly beancurd...yummy...but a few of them was totally turned off by the smell...haha...hmmm...only hansheng and i enjoyed the fried intestine...haha.gwen & Justine was forced to try it...hmmm...it was nice...reach home at 11 plus...super tired...



Good/Bad news!!!
Monday, January 05, 2009

dunno whether its good news or bad news...haha...cancel policy no need take unpaid leave le...so i no need think where to go le...but will have pay cut...Jan 8% Pay cut....Feb & Mar 10% Pay cut...but when economy get better...we will have back our original payafter the pay cut...i would earn almost the same as last month...which means...i wun have chance to get my promoted pay at all...sad sad...will still be getting the same pay...hee....but still ok la...cause take unpaid leave is 300+deducted...but now lesser amount get deducted...cannot exactly put how much cause some colleagues read my blog...hee



1st service of the year!!!!!!!!!!

yesterday dad a bad morning...got scolded by my dad...he say i come home for what...might as well just stay outside...say why last 2 weeks i so early go back...see tv...wah...people...can u imagine?can't even go home to watch tv...what kind of stupid logic...people's parents want their children be home early...i early go home...kena scolded...people's parents want their children to go home...i was scolded for going home...stupid right?dunno what he is thinking...so i can imagine my wed when i have leave...i will have to go out as usual and find a place to rot...till night time...tue worse...my medical checkup is at 11.20....so in the morning where i suppose to go? the good thing is the cg is going cycling at East Coast Park...so tue not so bad...wed i have no idea...no one taking leave that day in my office except me...sianz...

anyway...we had the 1st service of the year yesterday, though we always listen the same msg but Pastor got his way to make it different every year...hmmm...after svc went fellowship at VIVO...shared yong tau hu with my "daughter" -valerie...haha...i was saying like that can slim down and save $$...val is so nice...she treated me to hotdog bun yesterday morning...then i wanted light of the city cd...she say next week she buy for me...so sweet of her...haha...
went to the rooftop to play games..."small fish,big fish","Murderer" & "Chucky"....had fun playing the games...the members very easy to see they are murdere by their expressions and reactions...so in the end weijie killed me 1st before i can say anything...haha....but it was definitely fun with the forfeit having to shout HAPPY NEW YEAR loudly...hee...
after that went shopping with Yun Tian, Gwen, Jasmine, Hansheng & Wei Jie at River Island...Jasmine, Hansheng, Wei Jie & I got bored so we went outside to feel the breeze and took a pic of the sunset...

After that, Yun Tian, Hansheng, Wei Jie & I went for dinner...we had chicken rice...ate till i was so full...cannot tahan sia...hee...hmmm...food still ok la...hee...then we went home




Friday, January 02, 2009

I AM THE ONLY ONE COMING BACK TO WORK AFTER CHINESE NEW YEAR....NOT FAIR!!!!!!!!!!OUT OF 11 OF US IN MY OFFICE...ONLY I COMING BACK....at least marketing have 4 coming back...and operations 2 coming back...was thinking how to settle lunch...the rest who are coming back...i not so on good terms with them de...we are to clear our leave before taking unpaid leave...so praise God...for the month of Jan, i get my full pay and is my 1st promoted pay...hee...my schedule out le...my leave are as follows:

6-7Jan 2009 (Tue- Wed)
12-13Jan 2009 (Mon-Tue)
22-27Jan 2009 (Thu-Tue) (CNY Included)
5-10Feb 2009 (Thu-Tue)
19-24Feb 2009 (Thu-Tue)

Planning to go find Ailyn in Perak and visit her on 19-24Feb2009...



1st post in 2009!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

spent the last day of 2008 working till 5.30pm...then went to JB...Ate my dinner with Joanne, Jessie, Emily, Sharon & Wee Sin...then back to Wee Sin's house to watch little nyonya...then count down and watch tv till 2 plus...kinda boring to end the year ya....woke up at 7 plus ytd...cause Emily make so much noise...then went for breakfast-we have roti prata...then went marketing for lunch...bought tofu,cabbage,prawns,onions,oil,can logans...and lots...went back to help prepare lunch....had out lunch at bout 2pm...sharon cook really nice nice food...then watch disc again...watch Jia Hao Yue Yuan-3 episodes before we went back...wanted to stay one more day then today all come straight to work de...but joanne having dinner with her lanlord...Jessie, Emily and I went walk walk at City square and helped Clara buy 3 packs Malboro...cause 1 person can only take 1 pack into singapore...then Joanne msg at 8 to say they change the dinner to today...jessie say ask her u-turn...cause she wanna watch the disc...but in the end all of us head home..i reach home at 9.45 and i missed my little nyonya...sad sad...

hey guys...please pray for me...that day went to bed at Wee Sin's house was still alright but when i woke up yesterday...my thumb itchy and a bit pain...then it was like this until ytd 8 plus...my thumb became numb...it ryhmes...haha...but this morning...it became worse...my thumb is red & swollen...the worse is it spread to the hand...its like a line...then its pain..but now its itchy...some colleagues say maybe sting by bee...some say bitten by ants...going to doc this evening..hope it does not cost a lot...haiz...closer colleagues scolded and say i should have go doctor this morning...but its not as if they dunno...even if i got mc...i cannot go home...then where i go...haiz...today director coming back...going discuss our leave with her...if mine approved...next week i only work Mon n wed...tue confirm on leave cause medical checkup...but 8-13Jan haven confirm...but think is 95% no need work...boring...




"You are the light of the world. let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."
Matthew 5:14,16

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Serene
God's beloved child
18th November 1985
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