the feeling having to start all over again is so tiring...like last sat we have mid Autumn festival cg...i know they be discussing bout the activities or games and yet i was not involved...felt a bit lost...anyway...i made the decision to leave that time..and there are consequences for every decision and this is one of the consequence for that decision of leaving...i want to rise up again...to climb up again...to be a connect group leader or even a cgl...was feeling so xin ku and i jus cried during praise...it was really so hard to praise...and during worship, its a new song...when i heard those few sentences in red below,i sang it lifting everything up to God..
Depths of Your Love
By Christian Grindstaff
Before the earth, before all days You knew me.
Formed in Your image, made in Your likeness You love me,
The light of Your word,
The truth of Your promise guide me,
The power of Your mercy,
The love of Your grace deep inside,
Of me, It’s the depths of Your love,
Moving I the depths of me
I believe,
In the power of your name,
I believe,
In the promise of faith,
I believe,
In the love of a God
Jesus my savior,
I believe,
I believe
Speak to this mountain,
To move into the ocean,
Your authority given to me,
No matter what happens,
Here I am standing,
On the hope of Your word,
Promised to me
Sat Minghui preach that does not feel God's presence does not mean He is not there...and to let go of our past..think i starting to let go of some things which happen just some time ago and its hard, but no use clinging to it...